Thursday, September 30, 2004

Things that will just kill your ego... or at the very least make you feel good about yourself.

How's that for a title? I think I can get used to this whole blogger thing... I kinda feel bad for the people who are going by my website, and not finding anything. Then again the fact that I have told no one about this newer and "improved" blog may have something to do with it. Not having reinstalled Frontpage may have something to do with it as well.

Anyway, I've been in a real mood as of late (last 48 hours or so) I can't really decide what is causing it but I do know that it has stirred many thoughts feelings and what nots in me.

I think the thing that is pissing me off the most is still Emily 7 months later I'm still pissed that I chased this girl for FIVE YEARS finally get her and she bases our entire realationship upon whether or not I will pick and move for her. You know I thought we had a real realtionship, hell I thought we were going to get married. Intead the bitch dumps me because I won't move and I don't talk to her like I used to. It pisses me off, still! I know I shouldn't let little shit like that make me mad or otherwise raise my blood pressure but this has really been building inside of me for a while now and I need to get it out and your the fucker reading this so fuck off.

What would I say to her right now if Emily called? The following "Hello, sorry to hear you didn't get into grad school. I got promoted, was employee of the month, built a new computer, made a ton of new friends in IRON, and have rediscovered who I am. Thank you for liberating me from you and letting me get on with my life."

IF I could go back and do something diffrently what would I do? I would go back to July 28, 2003. I wouldn't have gone to Emily's house I would have stayed home and waited for Dorothea. We had our problems but what we had was real. That is the other thing that pisses me off to this day is I never gave Dorothea a fair shake because I was still carrying a flame/torch/whatever for Emily. Honestly Dorothea deserved way better then I treated her. I really feel bad how I left things however that is in the past and I have to let these things go.

Hopefully this is a step to that goal. You know what really is the killer? I passed up several hot women in school because of Emily, now that I'm kicking myself over.

AAAHHHHHH

fucking bitch.

Ok is out of me?

it's like a leak that will not end. I'm sure there is more in there but it doesn't want to come out right now.

Now if only I hadn't had taken her to Disneyland I wouldn't be calling it the most evil place on the planet.

Saturday, September 25, 2004

What a differnce 36 hours will make.

OK so it wasn't some weird goofy thing (goofy bad not goofy funny) that was making my HD go all Wacky. I've traced it down to the actual Southbridge RAID controller chip on the Motherboard. Neither old nor new drivers are seeming to fix it.

So I'm going to do what a normal computer type person will do... I order a SATA hard drive controller card. If that doesn't work then I will have a 200GB hard drive for sale.

So while I was dicking around with my computer last night I heard this "click" and then a second later "whirrrrrrrrrrrrr" and then nothing. I look over to my LINUX box and it's no longer on. OK time for a little background. My LINUX box is now about 3 years old, being state of the art 4 years ago. I built it for about $300 and some spare parts I had lying around. The only problem that box has ever had was the motherboard goes goofy (goofy bad) after about 840 hours of uptime (thats about 35 days) . This box wasn't just sitting there either I actually had it doing stuff; such as Web Server, Mail Server, Secure telnet Box, experimination, spare parts, looking for aliens, looking for a cure for cancer, dns resolution. Oh and don't forget the most important part... it was my main file server till about 3 months ago. Now it's just my main porn server.

Now that everyone is on the same page, I start trouble shooting.... now given the problems I've been having with "Heritic" as of later I started to think that maybe just maybe it was the motherboard. Wait though I've eaten a couple of power supplies on this puppy... Lets try that first... plug in Power Supply from other computer. "Click WHIRRRRR" ah it works.

The good news is it's easy to fix. The bad news it's a couple of days before I get the Power Supply since I'm not feeling like paying more then $20 for it.

Ok so that is a summary of all my computer problems for the last 36 hours. I know tons of fun.. then again your that goofy pair of eyeballs that just read it. (goofy funny, not goofy bad)

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Why LINUX is Grand, Windows Sucks, and more music...

OH my oh my oh my.... let me tell you about my experince with Windows (Windows XP PRO) and my 200 GB Western Digital Hard-Drive...


I bought a brand new WD 200GB hard drive about a month ago now to do what ever it is that hard drives do... I think their main function in life is to store porn and recipies.... so I gladly filled my WD 200GB with porn and recipies... and then my computer died. A sudden painfull death. So sudden and So painful that I had to send the motherboard and CPU back to get replacements. I got the replacments back and once I got the new stuff working the 200GB HD just stopped working.

And stopped working in not a good way either... so I do up the RMA stuff from Western Digital and today I recieved my new WD 200GB HD... only this one doesn't work either. It was manufactured on the 21st of September. I tend to think there may be something wrong with my mother board.

So now I'm booted in under LINUX and guess what kids... I can see my HD (which I can do under windows too) however I can also interact with my HD as well (que stunned silence and crickets)

Needless to say I'm a little mad at Micro$oft right now...

notice "l33t" speak... must be the primal script kiddie coming out in me.

Monday, September 20, 2004

Games Games and did I mention Games?

Ah the sweet sublime bliss that is a RPG... yep good old role playing game. You can take on the persona of whoever you want and away you go.

Of course I can never do anything the easy way... I have to do it online and do it with a MMORPG so of course I have a huge investment of time into a character so I'm emotinonally involved... actually come to think of it I'm more emotinally involved with my Star Wars Character then I was with Emily at the end... Hmmm I don't know if that is wrong or not.

So I find my self now trying other games firs there was Star Wars Galaxies... not bad first real RPG that I've played in a long time. I've enjoyed the social aspects of it all.

Now I've picked up a game called EVE (www.eve-online.com) I don't find myself playing that as much but I still play it quite a bit. I need something with some more speed to it.. alot more speed. I'm now looking at Planet Side (www.planetside.com) for no reason other then to try it out and see how well FPS works in a MMORPG enviroment.

Great here we go again...

Sunday, September 19, 2004

Deja vu vu?

Still working on the whole wedding mix thing... still very rough. Expect it to be that way for a couple of days...

I just finished editing down a section of Moby songs from the "Play" album.... I was having flash backs to driving back and forth between Kingman and Flag.....

I miss Flag, not as much as I used to but I still miss it.

Music....

Music is a funny thing... it sets the mood, seems to give defitinon and body to a event. Music can draw a memory to an emotion... a trip to disney land with the ex-girl friend that dumped you a month later... yeah fun stuff like that. No one said the emotions had to be good ones :)

So it is with great trepidation and I guess honor that I have agreed to help a friend with the music for his wedding. Normally I wouldn't do this type of thing but there are two things that made me say yes.

1. His entire collection of music is Punk and Techno...
2. If I don't help Curtis's sorry ass I don't know who will.

So I've been doing this whole creating a playlist thing all afternoon... I'm actually writing this while listening to a very very rough cut. So far I like it.

I guess the most dificult part about this is trying to find stuff that won't get my balls ripped off by Krissy. I.e. try to make it something meaningfull and at the same time unique.

I would be lying if I said I hadn't thought about what I want played at my own wedding.... though at the rate I'm going that is a LONG ways off.... it's ok though this gives me a couple of practice rounds.

Yeah no pressure... this is just one of those singular most important things in their lives things....

Tom breaks in...

Just a quick test to see how it all looks.